I guess he means that as a compliment. It makes my skin crawl every time he says it. I’ve told him several times how insulting it is but he doesn’t listen. I guess he’s a devoted student of the Pick Up Artists but I doubt he could even read.
I’m don’t say that because of his style or the way he talked or even his constant badgering. It’s just every reference that comes out of his mouth is from a movie and he misquotes most of the things he says.
“I’m gonna make you and offer you need to get wit.”
Yeah, he said that the first time we met and smiled at me like I should be impressed.
“Girl, you know you want this!”
Trust me I don’t and yet here we are in the center of the dance floor together. Actually, I was here first and he decided to slide up on my ass like I had invited him there. Can’t a girl just groove to a Roy Ayers melody in peace?
“Work that thang, Slumdog!”
I guess not.
I hate this club but Alana wants to celebrate her divorce being finalized here and who am I to put a damper on her party. She deserves this and I’m here to support her. What I didn’t deserve is this Eminem wanna be rubbing his crotch up against my butt. To make matters worse a crowd has formed because he’s talking louder than the music.
“This is the start of something beautiful, Karma Sutra!”
I’m through at this point. Whatever joy I had from letting the sensual smooth vibes Roy plays with passion on “Running Away” has left and I’m about to go as well. I take a few steps away, doing everything in my power not to haul off and slap him when he throws his hands in the air and yells, “I told you she couldn’t handle all this.”
There isn’t that much to handle. What he was rubbing against me felt like a roll of nickels in his pocket. The sound of his voice is booming and now everyone stares at us. I feel no shame about walking off the dance floor but with this much of an audience, I think it might be time to teach him a lesson.
I turn to see that smug look on his face and step up to him with nothing but confidence.
“Let’s just see how much you can take.”
The sides of his smile twitched nervously. I guess he didn’t expect such a strong response. As the music transitioned to something slow and soulful, I turn my back to him and look over my shoulder.
“Be careful what you wish for. You just might get it,” I whisper.
While his lips tremble from the fear of me accepting his challenge, I reach back, grab his pockets, pull him close and start a slow grind that pushes him out of his comfort zone.
“Oh shit,” he squeals in a high-pitched voice.
“Is there a problem?”
I pull him closer than he thought possible and felt what has to be the most miserable excuse for a cock poking at me. I couldn’t help but laugh, which only makes him more nervous.
“What the hell are you laughing at?”
“If you don’t know who will.”
The laughter from the crowd freaks him out. He places his hands on my back and tries to push me away.
“I don’t think so,” I shoot back as a give him a slow swivel of my hips. “I’m just getting warmed up.”
He almost chokes on his tongue as I move my hips in reverse. I feel his body tense up as I bend my knees for leverage.
“If you want me to stop just say so.”
Before the sound can escape from his mouth, I pull down on his pockets as I slowly stand, which forces the maximum amount of friction on him. He grabs my wrist in a death lock as his body goes into mini-convulsions. He releases a primal grunt and I quickly step away. The last thing I want is to stain this dress. He lets go of me and I walk towards Alana through the snickers of the crowd as they point at the obvious wet spot on his pants. I grab my drink from the table and turn around.
“You’re too much, Vee,” Alana says as she lifts her glass to toast me. “I doubt he’ll bother you again.”
The expression on his face looks like a puppy that knows he just missed the newspaper. He backs away in shame and disappears into the crowd.
“I don’t want to waste my time thinking about that fool anymore. Tonight is your night. Next round, I’m buying.”