And figuratively as well.
That’s one of the major aspects of well written erotica that I enjoy. It’s also the biggest misconception that most non-erotica readers use to label us.
“So, you sit around all day and make up stories about people having sex with each other?”
“Yeah. So, what’s your point?”
Well, a lot more goes into it than that and trying to explain that to people who don’t understand or don’t want to gets tiring. I write in different genres, styles and formats and the same amount of work goes into each and everything that I write. I do character bios, outline the story, incorporate themes, focus on what my characters want versus what my characters need. I write a rough draft, print it out, shred it grammatically, revise or rewrite, do another draft, print it out, wash, rinse and repeat until I feel it’s ready.
Yet all that work goes unseen and just because my characters end up fucking each other, or they watch other people fuck, or they are restrained while somebody fucks them doesn’t mean that the work is any less worthy. It’s erotica so you have to deal with “genital stimulation” but if you think that the only thing erotica is all about then you’re sadly mistaken.
I could rant about this all night long but the best way to get to the heart of this issue is by the following statement.
Nobody wants to read about boring people fucking each other!!!
Erotica works best when most of the details are focused beyond the genitals. There is an emotional and sometimes spiritual journey that leads us to the sexual experience. Those moments should come from a very specific emotional place in your characters. Sure, having your characters screw anything and anybody they want is always fun but there’s always an emotional reason for them to act that way.
And if you want to discount everything I’m writing by saying “Men only think about sex” you have to remember the most important word in that sentence is “think”.
This is why writers of erotica should be able to write stories of any sexual orientation because it’s not so much about “how” they do it but “why” they do it, which is the most important. (Even though the “how” is always hot if you let me get a peek into the “why”. Trust me on that.)
That might seem a little Freudian but guess what? We also do research as well.
And just for clarity, it works when you think outside the cock as well.
Of all the formats I write in erotica is the most freeing because if I’m clear what motivates my characters to act in a certain way, then I’m pretty sure the reader will understand as well. That’s true of any type of writing and I don’t have to worry about who you cast in the role in order for the story to work..
So, back to the person who questioned why I write erotica.
“Do you have sex with your husband?”
“Of course I do!”
“So, why do you have sex with him?”
“Well… because he’s my husband.”
“Do you enjoy having sex with your husband?”
“Is this going to go into one of you’re dirty stories?”
“I told you. Nobody wants to read about boring people having sex.”
“Well, I never! Fuck you, Kendel!”
She storms away without paying for her coffee.
I guess I touched a nerve. Now if I were to put her as a character in a story about a bondage foursome, that would be exciting! I guess you never really know where you’re stories are gonna come from, huh?